went to sch for english consultation today with jun jie. dong kai tagged along. as usual, we crapped throughout. hahahahahaha.

saw wen jie when we were leaving the sch. just a nod of acknowledgement between the two of us. why must things become like this? few weeks ago, we were still so close. calling each other "xiao eh" and "tao eh". did the lack of trust really destroyed our brotherhood? have things took a big cycle and went back to where we were when we were in sec 2? when wen jie and me were enemies?

back in sec 2, we had some bad blood between each other. because of a girl. yah. so back then, my head would be his prize and his ass being my victory. we want each other dead. gone from this world. soon things dead down. because i won the war? or maybe because he gave on hunting me down?

back to our own life. but it seems like it is destinied that our paths would cross again. this time. my brother rc wanted his ass and vice versa. early july. annual cross country. the showdown. almost got into a gang fight. wen jie's cliques versus dunman basketball team. i was there. rc apologised for what he did. it end. but from that day onwards. the tension was even more strained. i wanted his ass more. the victory would be mine. all mine.

came sec 3. damn. wonder if its heaven's will. we are in the same class. i still remember what rc told me. to control my temper. to call him for help if things went out of hand. i still remember. first day of sch. i was prepared for a brawl. one on wen jie's close friend. i was wondering if i would survive. being in the same class as him for 2 years.

a twist of fate? we got close. he wanted me to be his "tao eh". the strained ties. the bad blood. gone. a start of of a new page. a brotherhood. he was brought in by ky.

we had fun together. that night at samuel's house. 6th june 2006. elvis bdae was also around the corner. enjoyed that stayover. june holidays too. the night we spent on pulau ubin. the night cycling. the night that we endured the harsh rain on pulau ubin. that sleepless night. the promise to return there once again together. has it all become memories? or has it become some empty promises?

what caused him to commit those mistakes? to backstab us. to strike us down after what we did. it is all because of the lack of trust and the fear of being left out on his part. can i blame him for that? is it because we never reassured him enough? that he is one of us.

can everything go back to how it was? i don't know. i need an answer. a way out. someone show me the way. lost again i am.

fate? destiny? whatever you call it. are they the cause behind this? or are we the cause for it? should i just say too bad and let go? or should i rekindle this brotherhood again? like what happened to dk and sam?

things will never be the same the second time round.