its around 2 am in the morning and i'm not slp-ing. reason being that i've just bathed. how come? u huan loh! no lah. went for night run with ky and jm. cool right? met up at 10 pm. the ran from jm house to hendo camp located near changi village. y hendo camp? its the commando's camp!

but before we set off, we went to visit justin who was at dunman for the ncc air's camp. nice brothers aren't we? back to main topic, ran for like 1 hour plus until 11.30, we bought bus no. 29 back to tampines and ate our supper together.

crapped awhile then they went over to my house and played bball. nv did much, just some casual shoot around. then they went home after it started to drizzle.

that's all for updates, just wanna rant now. mothers arh mothers, they always think that they are correct. we are always wrong. then what are our brains for? lol. my mum asked me this,"why am i always living in my own world?" i nv answered. u can't blame me mum, that's the way i am. that's the way ky, jm and i are. accept us for the way we are. its our characteristic you know? i can't change you from being a perfectionist. and u too can't change this characteristic of mine. if it can be changed, then i won't be the jeremy lim born on 9th march and a teenage boy who's a piscean. get it? living in my own world, adoring freedom, doing things my own way and blah blah blah are bits and pieces of actions that made up my characteristic.

my thoughts and feelings run deep, i nv blamed you for not understanding me. u did a great job cause sometimes i don't even know myself at all. i simply am that carefree. i seldom brood over stuff. u should know it. nagging at me won't work. restricting me from doing anything won't work either. i'm the kind that the more u object me to do something, the more i want it done. u get it? that's the result of restricting my freedom. i'm all grown up. u may still think i'm a little kid and need your protection. i understand. every mother wants their children to remain a kid and stick to them as long as possible. but all i want is to explore this world. and when i'm lethargic and all, i know where to go. there's always a home for me. a place where protection will be. a place with someone whom i call mother.

i know right from wrong or wrong from right, whichever way u put it. i won't be like those ah beng going around getting into troubles. i nv wanted to be that way. i said it and u didn't trust me. all i need is trust. whenever i said that i am gonna do this, instead of encouragement, u gave me negative comments saying that u've tried and failed. hey man, come on. not everyone gets the same results all the time. if everyone gets the same results all the time, why are there failures and people who succeed? my results may differ from u. it can be worse, it can be whole lot better. whatever the results, fail or success, the bottomline is to learn. correct? if u disagree, the why everyone go to sch? i am also doing something u've tried before and said that its tough right? then why didn't u stopped me? u nv know how things will be like if you don't try.

when i go and stay overnight at mac, u said that ppl got killed staying overnight or staying out late. first, we pay tax to the government for what? the police get their pay for what? what are cctv for? decorations? hell no! singapore is a safe country. maybe not that safe because once in a while, we have some nutcase running around killing ppl. but count, singapore got how many town? how many ppl? the possibilty of me being the victim is 1 in 4 million. maybe if i'm that suay, i will kena. but don't worry, i'm not alone. what are friends for man. i wasn't outside alone, i'm always with a bunch of ppl who knows what to do. we are not those kind of useless freak that only know how to run, cry and give stunned faces when everything goes wrong.

secondly, if one person stayed out late and get killed, then does it mean all those who stayed out late will get killed too? one person fall down from bike in ubin and broke his teeth. does that mean whoever go ride a bike in ubin will fall down and break his teeth also? no way! correct? i am not going against u or something. i just wanna say whatever that's in my mind. u nv owe me anything. in fact, i owed u everything. my life, my eyes, my arms, my knee blah blah blah. all these are the best presents i've got from u. 9 months with me inside your womb is a tough thing. i know although i nv and won't ever go through that process. i will do whatever that's within my ability to fulfil whatever u asked from me. i won't abandon u like those ungrateful rich ppl. i will treat u like the way u treated me while bringing me up. so u don't huan loh. every story that u told me, i know every your every objective and morale being it. i'm not dimwitted. but sometimes, i just can't live the way u want me to u know? everyone has their limit. there's also something i wanna do other than fulfilling that something call filial piety.

i hope you'll get it someday, its not rebelling like every other ppl sees it. its just simple and plain, i'm trying to be myself. and while doing that, i will nv forget being a filial son. i'm not those ungrateful sort. bottomline? accept me for being me and you'll see the usual me who's cheerful at home instead of the jeremy who rather keep quiet and face the computer at home everyday.

i'm done with my beloved mum. i'm not scolding her or whatever, i'm just saying my piece. now moving on to a certain person. while surfing the net and looking at blogs while waiting to cooldown. i came over this particular person's blog. i won't say who. guess if u one. but good luck have fun, eventhough u got it, i won't say its who. hey girl (that's a big hint), no one owes u a living. for whatever shit that happened to u. accept it and move on. that's the way of life. and stop getting attention from others. attention comes in two ways. out of concern and out of sympathy. from the way i know things, the attention u got are out of sympathy. *note! my mum just walked from her bedroom and nagged at me again.* fate controls our own destiny or we control our destiny, i won't debate on it now.

whatever happened, take it in stride, learn from it and move on. no use shooting the crap out of those who infuriated u, worse still, getting ppl on your side cause ur blog just scared the living shit out of me. how can so many ppl do so many wrong shit to one person? maybe there's 3 possibilities. first, you suck and ppl want to pawn your ass. second, you are adding oil to fire and blowing up a minor shit. lastly, ur life is too boring and u want some excitement. either way, one piece of advice. life's too short to quarrel over some useless shit. rather than quarreling with each other, debating whose fault it really is and flaming the holy shit out of each other. why don't u try to make things out fine? a friend is always better than a foe. yah? i not flaming you or whatsoever. i'm not that free.

to live life happily or miserably, only u can decide it. to love, to shit, to cry, to laugh, etc. only u can decide it. understand? don't let this kind of things get over you. u got much better things to do other than to bother about what other's had said.

lastly, holy crap. a short post to kill time while i wait for my hair to dry took turned out to be such a long post. lol. not bad. gonna slp liao. bball tml.

video killed the radio star!